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So, you know that War on Women we all know is actually happening right now and has been in place for decades? Well, this woman is here to tell you we’ve won - and now, apparently, men are the true target. Because ”Believe it or not, modern women want to get married. Trouble is, men don’t” - because ”women aren’t women anymore”.
Right. Furthermore:
“…the so-called rise of women has not threatened men. It has pissed them off. It has also undermined their ability to become self-sufficient in the hopes of someday supporting a family. Men want to love women, not compete with them. They want to provide for and protect their families – it’s in their DNA. But modern women won’t let them.”
OH GOD FORBID WE PISS OFF THE MENS AND DEPRIVE THEM OF THEIR MANLY RIGHTS EVERYONE. BECAUSE WOMEN HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT’S LIKE TO BE UNDERMINED AND DISRESPECTED, AMIRITE?
Venker goes on to explain there are “hundreds of men” she’s been speaking with who are disappointed by the non-feminine nature of the modern woman - however, I remain thoroughly unconvinced. I mean, the men I know seem generally nonplussed. That may be because I am incredibly selective about who I spend my time with and sometimes forget other people exist, but regardless…There are many wonderful men on board with feminism who I know to be perfectly content to let the women in their lives take the reigns. There are feminist couples. They do exist.
I mean, my fiance would totally take my surname (it’s something we’ve discussed frequently) and is content to daydream about his future as a potential house husband whilst I am off pursuing my career. The men I’ve befriended in my life have girls on their arms with fiercely feminist ideals - ideals that do not provide a means for “competition” as Venker suggests, but rather an opportunity to communicate, grow, and learn together.
So I really just fail to see the logic in encouraging women to forgo feminism in an attempt to appear “marriageable” enough to snag a husband from a pool of misogynists.
Feminism isn’t going anywhere. It’s taking over the minds of men who would rather stand by feminism than let their dicks get in the way of being decent human beings and loving partners. Those incapable of withstanding the heat are welcome to live together in a fabricated world of ignorant, cookie-cutter, marital bliss. The real world will continue to deal with the shit that matters.
Fat Body Politics: What is Internalized Misogyny?
I touched briefly upon a type of internalized misogyny in a recent post, but I didn’t delve too deeply into an explanation of what it was. Seeing as how the post has garnered a lot of attention, I thought it would be a good idea to flesh it out a little more.
In Western society, masculinity is privileged over femininity, which is seen as “lesser than”, therefore making it an undesirable trait. This is reflected in how men and women are encouraged and discouraged to act out socially. It is perfectly acceptable for women to emulate traditionally masculine behaviours such as wearing pants or engaging in sports that incorporate full body contact, such as football. However, if a male were to engage in stereotypically feminine activities like wearing a dress or taking ballet, he would face ridicule. Other stereotypical activities associated with femininity, such as shopping or applying make-up, are viewed as frivolous, whereas watching sports is a legitimate past time. This negative reaction suggests that being a woman is somehow degrading.
Women, who are exposed to this constant degradation, absorb these societal cues. Some women will therefore by conditioned to value masculinity over femininity and show disdain for all things feminine. Women can project these emotions by criticizing other women, particularly female celebrities in the tabloids.
Furthermore, women may also associate all things feminine with being female. It is not uncommon to hear young girls distancing themselves from femininity by proclaiming that they are “only friends with boys because girls are catty” or completely detach themselves from their own gender by uttering statements like, “I’m not like other girls”. This learned self-loathing is known as internalized misogyny.