Redefining Body Image


QUOTE
9:58 am
May 31, 2012
28 notes

I’m committed to being in the body I have, taking care of it through exercise and healthy food, but never disassociating from or denying my stomach or my thighs or the rolls of fat on my back.

I no longer believe those things should be hidden from view. I don’t believe in flattering, in hiding or masking or Spanxing. I believe in belly outlines and flabby arms all a flutter, in jiggling double chins and stretch marks and cellulite and rolls aplenty. These are our true bodies, the ones that everyone keeps shrouded in cotton invisibility cloaks, except for the occasional decolletage or bared calf.

But what are we hiding from and for whom? And if we showed those things, would anything change? Did no one know I was fat when I wore long sleeved caftans and wide-leg pants? To this still newbie and sometimes naked model, fat activism and acceptance is not one movement or campaign, but is found in each exposed dimple and unfettered belly.

And so yes, I pose in my underwear, and in my less than underwear, and in a fluffy skirt and netted hat. But each person in a miniskirt (fat or thin or inbetweenie) is a triumph, each exaggerated belly and bold print over bolder ass a statement, and we, of all shapes and sizes, should not be afraid to speak out.


I’m An Adipositivity Model by Alison Michelle at xojane

Tags: quote words body image flattering fuck flattering vbo fat fashion adipositivity


TEXT
2:29 pm
May 30, 2012
69 notes
Muffin Top

TW for possible food/body shaming discussion, just to be safe.

So one of my dear colleagues just came by with two trays of MASSIVE chocolate muffins. After being denied by at least ten people before coming to me, (“OH I shouldn’t, I’ve been gaining a bit of weight.” “No no no, I’ve been trying to be good.” “Ugh don’t tempt me!”) she presents me with her spread of delicious sweets. I think I am the only person in our cluster of cubicles who thanked her and happily grabbed one without hesitation.

I WILL EAT ALL YOUR MUFFINS.

Seriously though, why do people feel the need to tack a disclaimer onto their decisions to eat/not eat certain foods in public spaces? Who gives a fuck WHY, just take it or leave the goddamn food! 

So now I’m the one fatty in a sea of thin-privileged colleagues, happily munching on a muffin.

And maybe other people noticed that I took one when everyone else didn’t - maybe they’re passing judgement on my desire to indulge, taking into account my corpulent body and appetite. 

I might have cared about all of that once upon a time.

But fuck them. I have a delicious muffin.



Tags: food shaming body shaming judgement body image food health muffins


LINK
8:47 am
May 30, 2012
47 notes
Why I quit dieting

morebutter:

Why I quit dieting

I have tried a lot of diets in my life. Atkins, vegan, Weight Watchers, counting calories, Weigh Down Workshops, Paleo, Zone, South Beach, food logs. I’ve worked with nutritionists and therapists. I’ve done the shakes, the herbal supplements, the cleanses. I’ve spent hours in the gym, I’ve trained for races, I’ve done CrossFit, I’ve lifted weights. I’ve tried a lot of things. I’ve spent thousands of dollars. None of these efforts (and concentrated, years-spanning efforts many of them were) have succeeded to get me thin in the long term.

I finally got fed up, and about two years ago, and decided that instead of going on another diet, I would start doing some research about why nothing was working for me. I learned that dieting almost never works. That losing and gaining weight repeatedly was unhealthy. That I didn’t have to be thin to be healthy. I started to do more research. I read more books, I visited blogs, I investigated health journals and read papers and published research. I became more and more curious. Read the full post

I love this because it aligns with my own journey to a diet-free existence, which all started with questioning. 

“WHY?”

As soon as we start to question all of these things that stand in our way, we can begin to break them down to a powder and blow them away.

Also, definitely click-through to the full article, there are a number of really amazing resources!

Source: bodypositiveyoga.com
Tags: HAES health at every size dieting weight loss body image fat acceptance resources links


TEXT
8:48 am
May 29, 2012
5 notes
tw: body image/emotional eating/”fat shaming”

hi! I love your blog and I love the message for people to love themselves no matter what(fat/skinny, healthy/unhealthy and everything in between). What I’m wondering, however, is do you think the obesity “problem” in north america stems a lot from companies like macdonalds targeting children and impoverished people/families with their cheap food? It’s true that sugar and fat are literally addictive and eating too much food with high sugar/fat content causes health problems, so I think the “problem” has more to do with corporate greed than people being fat lazy slobs that need to get a life(that’s sarcasm). 

This message isn’t to say that being fat is a problem either. I’m mainly addressing the health issue(and that’s not to say that thin people aren’t unhealthy/fat people aren’t healthy, you don’t know a person’s individual history/lifestyle until you know, so no judgement here based on body type). 

Not that it’s anyones business as to why a person looks the way they do, I think people need to keep in mind that north american society/culture is very food oriented and there’s a lot of unhealthy shit readily available for consumption for low costs. Stop shaming people for being fat and start shaming mega food corporations for (for lack of a better example) forcing crap food down people’s throats. I know you make your own “choices” about what food you’re going to eat, but honestly, it’s not always that simple. Personally, I am an emotional binge eater and from an early age I comforted myself with food. I still have issues with food and I probably always will. For now, I’m not “fat” and I havn’t been technically overweight for about 10 years, but I struggle with body image/food every day. My mother is the same way and I feel like I got a lot of these bad habits from her. I just wish that instead of shaming people for their bodies there could be more positive messages about loving yourself and more readily available healthy food/ways to learn about nutrition and healthy lifestyles. 

Sorry if this message is all over the place, main thing is I love your blog and I thank you for your positive messages about self love. Push aside judgmental attitudes and focus on making things better for yourself! Happiness is contagious so make a difference for others by making a difference for yourself. 

thanks!

——

This is a topic that has been brought up a few times before and it always makes me feel uncomfortable because like…yeah, shitty processed food exists but it is not and never will be my place to judge anyone for consuming it, regardless of their situation. And like you’ve said, it’s not always as simple as making the “right” or the “healthy” choice. 

I could try to pick apart my thoughts on this, but honestly - I feel this quote from a post by fattypolitic sums up my thoughts on the subject pretty thoroughly:

“How many people by now have no idea that eating more fruits and vegetables, lean protein, and drinking plenty of (unpolluted) water is better for you than processed food?

I know it. Everyone knows it.

What these arrogant shits who keep aiming to “teach low income people” is not something we don’t know. 

If you want to “teach” me something about food then teach me how to make $30 a week for three people stretch without processed meals.  

Or how about you stop assuming we are ignorant of the fact that fresh foods are better for us than hamburger helper and look at the root of WHY we have to buy the shit.

Once again, it’s just easier to assume ignorance and laziness than it is to apply any critical thinking or empathy.”

Thank you for submitting!



Tags: submission body image perspective health food shaming fat shaming


TEXT
4:15 pm
May 28, 2012
11 notes

Hey!

First of all, I am loving this blog - partly for the general message, and partly for all the gorgeous big babes I get to look at. 

Secondly, I just want to talk a little bit about my relationship with my body, if I may.

So, by the time I was 15, I was 6’ 2” and 240 lbs. I was also practically boobless with zero semblance of feminine shape, but at least with the power of deeply unflattering school uniforms, nobody could really tell.

I was about 17 before I suddenly sprouted DD tits and a waist (I’ll always remember my friend staring at my chest and saying “where did THEY come from?!”), but thinking I had no other option, I still lived day-to-day in band t-shirts, jeans, and blazers, and was not only introverted, but horribly shy. It took going to university and catching the eye of a very beautiful blonde to bring me out of my shell a little bit more, and with a bit of newfound contentment came not only a new style, but a bit of weight gain.

I distinctly remember feeling the need to warn said beautiful blonde when we started going out together that I’d discovered stretch marks on my belly and I had no idea when they had emerged. She said she wasn’t at all bothered, but why had they been such a shock to me? How could I not have noticed something happening to my own body? “Because I never look at it”, I replied. She was astounded, but that was normal to me. I still wasn’t happy within myself, and I couldn’t foresee a time when I ever would be.

After university I went through a few years of depression because I was lodged firmly in a rut with no clue what to do with my life, but I’m 25 now, with this year being The Year of Change (I have a job I love and I’m learning to drive), and the biggest alteration I’ve made is a reasonably sudden love of my body. Where this new attitude has come from, I couldn’t say (certainly not from an admirer like at uni, as I’ve been single since splitting up with aforementioned beautiful blonde), but I now buy clothes that show off my body, everything I own is brightly coloured and/or highly patterned, I wear lots of eye make-up (actually that’s something thing I always did - along with dyeing my hair awesome colours - only now it’s less of a defence mechanism and more about beauty), and I’m no longer going to apologise for walking into a room and invariably getting looked at by everybody in it.

But therein lies the problem: what everybody else thinks of me, or more accurately, what I THINK everybody else thinks of me. When I meet new people and the subject of size/weight comes up, and I say something humorously self-deprecating about myself, the response is always the same - “oh, but you’re tall, you carry it well/you’re in-scale”. And that’s true, and I am aware of this privilege that being tall brings, because there’s no way I’d look good in a lot of what I wear at my weight and size (300lbs, UK size 20/22) if I was short and round. But that’s not to say I am any less affected by my own size than anybody else. Let me tell you, my height especially has been the absolute bane of my life. For those years I actually wore jeans (I don’t any more; I live in dresses), it was virtually impossible to find trousers with a 36” inside leg length, and don’t even get me started on finding women’s size 10 shoes when almost all shoe shops stop at 8. And how many times a week do I need to be told “god, I wish I was your height”? No, no you really don’t. I don’t want my experiences of warped body image to be written off because I’m “in-scale”, especially by the 5’ 4” size 14 girls who are complaining about being overweight right in front of me. No. That’s not cool.

But being tall AND fat is like the double whammy of unattractiveness in a woman, this mean little voice in my head constantly reminds me, and no matter how many times I hold my head up and tell myself that anybody who judges on that is a moron, it still affects me. It probably always will. It’s what I assume is everyone’s first impression of me. That paranoia is there, and while I’m no longer shy, I’m still an introvert. I think deeply, and sometimes obsessively, over things that quite often don’t matter or are way off the mark of being correct. As much as I accept myself these days, it is a general assumption of mine that nobody else in the world finds me attractive. I don’t mean that in a sulky, depressive teenage manner, I mean it’s just something I genuinely assume is true. I’m so completely resigned to it at this point, it doesn’t even make me sad. I don’t even really care. But at the same time, I’ve been conditioned by societal constraints to think that way, because nobody has ever in my life straight-up told me, “you’re unattractive”. That’s never happened. In fact, a lot of my friends regularly tell me the opposite, as does my mum, and I might believe them sometimes, but strangers are a whole different kettle of fish (it doesn’t seem to matter how many randoms in pubs try to hit on me, either). I just can’t decide whether this attitude is actually damaging if I’ve already accepted myself or not.

So, my relationship with my body is still quite wonky. I love it, but I still never look at it naked. I think I look good, but I’m certain that nobody is sexually attracted to me. 

Bottom line is, I’m happy right now. I got tired of waiting for my life to start, so I hot-wired it and got it going myself. That’s got to count for something.

Bonus: poor-quality phone photo of myself from this morning.

Me



Tags: submission story photo body image fat


VIDEO
11:32 am
May 24, 2012
643 notes


crimble-crumble:

teaplusbeardspluscake:

lyricalblueswing:

chubby-bunnies:

fuckyeahsexeducation:

In case you needed more of a reason to love Laci Green

Oh hello. I love you.

Yes yes and a million times yes. Everything in this. Just yes.
It’s nice to see a smaller person echoing the same rhetoric that I do as a bigger person.

But why do I feel so weird about a slim person validating my size but in such a positive video? I dunno. This is so awesome, because FA is all about pushing to normalise fat bodies and the word itself and to have non-fat people on board is FUCKING RAD. I just feel kinda patronized in a way? Am I completely alone in that? Am I just being cynical as fuck? I don’t even know.
But for the most part, I love it.

^ I love Laci Green, I really do. I also totally understand where you’re coming from. It makes me uncomfortable when non-fat/slim people stand up for fat bodies. I mean, it’s lovely, but…I can’t help but feel as though plus-size people’s voices and bodies aren’t validated until non-fat people speak for us. Like, “Oh look! A pretty, white, slim-privileged person thinks all those fat, icky bodies are cool, so…maybe they are cool?” Laci’s message is a positive one, yes, but it’s like, why can’t I as a plus-size person talk about my body in a similarly sharp, evocative way and, in so doing, validate my body and my presencemyself. 

Overall, I am in agreement with Laci and it’s totally awesome to have her on board the FA movement. Her voice is indeed a powerful one.



Source: fuckyeahsexeducation
Tags: Laci Green Fat Acceptance body politics body image fat bodies video


TEXT
8:49 am
May 24, 2012
6 notes

from tertiatertia

Since moving back home, my mom’s frequent critique of other people’s body types and style choices has become increasingly obnoxious.  I’m grateful that she doesn’t make comments about my body or food choices, but she certainly comments on herself and others.  For example, we were out together all last Saturday.  While stopped at a red light, a chubby boy (probably eight years old) ran across the street.  “You need to do more of that!” my mom commented from inside the car, “that” referring to running.  Of course the boy couldn’t hear her, but the fact that she said that about a little kid was irritating.  I called her out on it, she agreed that she shouldn’t be so judgemental.

Later that day we were in a building with a scale which she was eager to step on.  At first she thought the number was much too low, but after I weighed myself and saw that the measurement was fairly accurate, she was thrilled.  Thrilled to the point where she continued to bring it up throughout the day.  Now, since I’ve been away at college, my mom has made some really great lifestyle changes (she makes a greater variety of yummy, nutritious meals than she did when I was younger, she goes on frequent walks, etc.) and she’s lost weight because of it.  And she’s happy about it.  And I’m happy for her.  But for the rest of the day after she weighed herself, her and her boyfriend kept bringing up the scale.  We were at the grocery store where they had a scale for weighing produce, and her boyfriend suggested she weigh herself in that.  By the end of the day, I wanted to shout “WEIGHT IS JUST A STUPID NUMBER.”

That same day we saw some girls dressed in eccentric outfits and my mother felt the need to comment on how they were clearly looking for attention.  Why else would anyone dress that way?  Again, I told her she needed to stop judging people based on their appearances/wardrobe choices.  That turned into her telling me I was too self-righteous, and that because she was older she was allowed to be cynical and that when I got to be her age I would understand.  Um…?  Obviously I pass judgement on people - of course I am not perfect - but I try to understand where others are coming from and not vocalize my judgements.

I’ve had a positive self body image for as long as I can remember, but this blog has really helped me to address the way I view other bodies, as well as improving my approach to exercising and intuitive eating.  Like you, I’m close with my mom, and I would love to turn her on to this movement, but I don’t think she’d be receptive to it.  It can be frustrating at times, but I know that the only outlook I have the power to change is my own.  RBI has totally helped me to achieve that. :]

——

Thank you for sharing love. It is hard when we make progress in our lives and the people around us are stuck in their ways. All we can do is start a dialogue about it and see what happens.

Got a story about creating body positive safe spaces in your life? Have a question about how to deal with family/friends who don’t understand your perspective? I wanna hear from you! Ask me a question or Submit a story.



Tags: story body image health submission weight loss


PHOTO
4:36 pm
May 23, 2012
86 notes

Photo Booth
vanityisasocialconstruct:

I’ve always struggled with my large arms. But why should I? They’re warm, soft, and womanly. Now, I think they make me look grown up. I’m proud to love this genetic trait that so many of my female family members let keep them from wearing short-sleeved shirts in the summertime. That line of shame stops here.

I just had to reblog this because my arms have ALWAYS been a source of conflict in my journey to owning every bit of my body and I totally feel you on this, especially as summer is arriving.
Last summer I went to Paris and let my fat arms fly. It was fabulous.

It took me a super long time to get to this point. Just a few years ago, I would have been drowning in sweat, donning a cardigan in the hot sun. Fuck that noise.
I have always had wide shoulders, husky, thick, strong arms - swimmers arms - arms that mirror that of my family members. There was a time they were a bit more sculpted by sprints and swim drills, but they have always been unyieldingly THICK. Love them.

vanityisasocialconstruct:

I’ve always struggled with my large arms. But why should I? They’re warm, soft, and womanly. Now, I think they make me look grown up. I’m proud to love this genetic trait that so many of my female family members let keep them from wearing short-sleeved shirts in the summertime. That line of shame stops here.

I just had to reblog this because my arms have ALWAYS been a source of conflict in my journey to owning every bit of my body and I totally feel you on this, especially as summer is arriving.

Last summer I went to Paris and let my fat arms fly. It was fabulous.

It took me a super long time to get to this point. Just a few years ago, I would have been drowning in sweat, donning a cardigan in the hot sun. Fuck that noise.

I have always had wide shoulders, husky, thick, strong arms - swimmers arms - arms that mirror that of my family members. There was a time they were a bit more sculpted by sprints and swim drills, but they have always been unyieldingly THICK. Love them.


Source: vanityisasocialconstruct
Tags: hot favorite body part self-love self love self-care self care arms body image submission


PHOTO
4:00 pm
May 23, 2012
21 notes

Photo Booth
fuckyeahbodypositivity:

plantfaster:

Learning to love myself again involves appreciating my favorite parts of myself. This photo is almost a year old but fact still stands: I love my shoulders.

shoulders/freckles positivity!

fuckyeahbodypositivity:

plantfaster:

Learning to love myself again involves appreciating my favorite parts of myself. This photo is almost a year old but fact still stands: I love my shoulders.

shoulders/freckles positivity!


Source: plantfaster
Tags: freckles skin body body image photo


PHOTO
3:27 pm
May 23, 2012
46,285 notes

HP oj6100
breadstickjalapeno:

landlockedbaker:

sugaryumyum:

I hate this shit.
If I want to shave my legs, I will. And that doesn’t make me a pawn of the patriarchy; it makes me a feminist who feels like shaving my legs.
Yes, shaving my legs is altering my natural body. And so is makeup and hair dye and bras and tweezing your eyebrows and getting tattoos and piercings. So is every single beauty ritual you engage in. But shaving seems to be the one many latch on to as proof of oppression.
Some days I love my legs furry and others I love them smooth. I like my hair being pink, purple, and blue. I like my tattoos and piercings. I like altering my body into ways that make me feel authentic and honest. I like owning my body and being the only who decides what is and isn’t acceptable. You’re not allowed to shame me for my choices. You’re not allowed tot tell me I’m doing something wrong when I make a decision that affects only me. No, that’s not true. You have every right to tell me I’m wrong to do what I choose to my body. Just like I have every right to tell you to go fuck yourself.
I’m allowed to have furry legs while wearing makeup. I’m allowed to shave my legs while sporting wild eyebrows. I’m allowed to let my fur grow for some years and shave weekly during others. I’m allowed to have a mustache while wearing bright red lipstick. I’m allowed to dress in ways that annoy and offend you. I’m allowed to be visible in any way I find appropriate. I’m allowed to be fat and lumpy and rippled. And why am I allowed those things? Because it’s my body.
Body policing is body policing. And it’s bullshit. You’re not allowed to shame me for the choices I make. And seeing these messages on body acceptance sites? Hypocritical and crazy making. “You should love yourself…as long as you do the things I deem acceptable.”
It’s my body and I will do whatever the fuck I want to it in order to make it look however the fuck I want it to.
Dear Universe: I’m feisty today! Love, Heidi
(This isn’t only about shaving and body hair, obviously.  It just happened to be an image I see a lot and I felt like getting all RAWR over.)

this!

Whenever I reblogged this I always thought of those who think they HAVE to shave, rather than those who choose to. But the commentary is lovely.

Reblogged for commentary.

breadstickjalapeno:

landlockedbaker:

sugaryumyum:

I hate this shit.

If I want to shave my legs, I will. And that doesn’t make me a pawn of the patriarchy; it makes me a feminist who feels like shaving my legs.

Yes, shaving my legs is altering my natural body. And so is makeup and hair dye and bras and tweezing your eyebrows and getting tattoos and piercings. So is every single beauty ritual you engage in. But shaving seems to be the one many latch on to as proof of oppression.

Some days I love my legs furry and others I love them smooth. I like my hair being pink, purple, and blue. I like my tattoos and piercings. I like altering my body into ways that make me feel authentic and honest. I like owning my body and being the only who decides what is and isn’t acceptable. You’re not allowed to shame me for my choices. You’re not allowed tot tell me I’m doing something wrong when I make a decision that affects only me. No, that’s not true. You have every right to tell me I’m wrong to do what I choose to my body. Just like I have every right to tell you to go fuck yourself.

I’m allowed to have furry legs while wearing makeup. I’m allowed to shave my legs while sporting wild eyebrows. I’m allowed to let my fur grow for some years and shave weekly during others. I’m allowed to have a mustache while wearing bright red lipstick. I’m allowed to dress in ways that annoy and offend you. I’m allowed to be visible in any way I find appropriate. I’m allowed to be fat and lumpy and rippled. And why am I allowed those things? Because it’s my body.

Body policing is body policing. And it’s bullshit. You’re not allowed to shame me for the choices I make. And seeing these messages on body acceptance sites? Hypocritical and crazy making. “You should love yourself…as long as you do the things I deem acceptable.”

It’s my body and I will do whatever the fuck I want to it in order to make it look however the fuck I want it to.

Dear Universe: I’m feisty today! Love, Heidi

(This isn’t only about shaving and body hair, obviously.  It just happened to be an image I see a lot and I felt like getting all RAWR over.)

this!

Whenever I reblogged this I always thought of those who think they HAVE to shave, rather than those who choose to. But the commentary is lovely.

Reblogged for commentary.


Source: happy2bsad
Tags: body image body hair feminism


TEXT
8:53 am
May 23, 2012
10 notes

I wrote this post the other night and while it doesn’t deal with fat positivity, it is about a recent struggle I’ve had with my breasts—in a multitude of ways. I originally posted it on my personal blog, but I think it’s a useful and possibly helpful story for other women going through the same thing. If this doesn’t quite fit the parameters of what you’re looking for, I understand. Thanks.

———

For the past few months, I’ve come to find my large chest unbearable. I’ve been a 34 DD since I was 15 years old, but since this year began, I’ve noticed that my breasts have gotten even larger. True, I have gained about 10 pounds, but I’m still a relatively thin young woman (27-28 inch waist), so my breasts are very much out of proportion with my body—a fact that causes me pain, physically and otherwise. I used to be proud of how voluptuous I was, but over the past year I eye my figure more with frustration than appreciation, for a variety of reasons.

I worry that they’ll only get bigger, especially if I make the decision to ever have children at some point.

Exercise is already painful and uncomfortable; I can seldom play a tennis match for more than half an hour without my back/neck growing numb.

I stood for the past 3 days at an outdoor music festival this past weekend and my back and neck still feel knotted.

I’m tired of finding it so difficult to buy clothing because of the disparity between my waist and my bust.

I’m tired of spending twice the amount on a bra that women who wear an A-C cup would wear. And I’m tired that these bras are usually ugly and designed for women decades older than my 21 years.

Sometimes I think that all people see when they first meet me are my breasts. And that because of my breasts I am seen as stupid and inferior. 

Last week, I was walking from the gas station to my apartment in the middle of the afternoon and two men got out of a van in front of me. One stopped beside me and yelled: “You have very large breasts.” When I didn’t reply the other loudly agreed: “Those things are huge.” I didn’t know what to say, so I returned to my apartment and cried because I felt degraded and yes, violated. I wasn’t wearing a low-cut shirt, but honestly, it really doesn’t matter if I was, as I should have the right to dress as I please without facing harassment as I’m running errands. While this is more of a reflection of those particular people rather than of me or my figure, I’m not naive. I know that I can shout on the street, make a scene, attempt to tell them how inappropriate their behavior is, but there are hundreds of thousands of other pigs out there and I can’t change everyone’s mind. 

So I mentioned that I wanted the procedure to my mother, especially since the timing is very important; I only have a few years left on my parents’ fairly good health insurance plan. As my mother has sought advice from friends who have had the procedure, as well as placed calls to local plastic surgeons, we have come to realize that like so many procedures that better women’s mental and physical health, this will likely not be covered by our insurance. This realization has made me angry and hurt all over again, as countless websites and other materials I’ve read state that I’m an ideal candidate for surgery because of my age, pain-level, and proportions. It appears that while surgeons might believe this, insurance companies won’t approve me because of age, and therefore my discomfort is irrelevant. I think of young women I’ve known who have wanted hysterectomies only to have their concerns and desires dismissed by those who “know better.” And I wonder why so often, specifically when women seek a procedure at odds with societal norms of beauty and otherwise, the question is not: “How can we make you more comfortable?” But, “What is the matter with you?”

And that is also degrading.

——

Thank you so much for submitting, Kat - You bring up so many valuable points.

I have known women in your situation and watched them struggle with the same kind of pain and issues. I’ve seen how breast reduction surgery can make a a HUGE difference in a woman’s life; relieving back issues, pain, posture, mobility, confidence…It should be a no-brainer. It’s unfair that it isn’t.

I really hope you can find some form of relief and comfort. You deserve it.

<3 Haley



Tags: submission story body image health perspective


TEXT
8:37 pm
May 22, 2012
8 notes
Eye Opening

submission from thatawkwardgeekygirl:

I just wanted to thank this blog and all of it’s contributors. I’m not fat, but I struggle with body image, and the need to constantly fit someone else’s idea of beauty and health. I -fear- gaining weight, for all the reasons stated in this blog; weight is associated with laziness, poor nutrition and ill health. This “war on obesity” is double-edged; God help you if you fall into the “enemy” ranks of fat people, who so obviously deserve to be fixed and saved from themselves, and God help you if you’re skinny because DAMN if you won’t be harassed or belittled for even gaining a little weight. Thank you for opening my eyes to my own fears and insecurities, and thank you for giving me so many positive examples in the people and articles you feature so I can face those same feelings and, eventually, conquer them. -I- own my body, it is -mine-, and no one can tell me how to live or what is healthy.

Thank you for getting that through my thick skull, because I’ve heard it so many times but I never -got- it, that I need to love myself, and make choices for myself based on that love, not because I fear how someone will judge me.

I know it’s going to be a struggle, but thank you thank you THANK YOU for giving me the start I need.

——

Messages like this always tug at my heartstrings in this really lovely way because I am just SO HAPPY!!! And RBI can not possibly take all the credit - you opened your mind and found your way and I’m so excited for you.

Much love,

<3 Haley



Tags: body image fat perspective submission


PHOTO
8:30 pm
May 22, 2012
2,479 notes
fitnessmisconceptions:

[Image text: “‘Fat’ is an adjective, not an insult”]
redefiningbodyimage:

morganchooses:

anatomyofaqueen:

redefiningbodyimage:

“Fat” is an adjective - not an insult.

Erm… Words used as insults generally ARE adjectives… and just about every other type of word. Like Nouns, etc o.O It’s all in how you USE the word that MAKES it an insult. I could make PUDDING an insult if  I wanted to. Or Plates, or Pants, or Cookies.
I get what you’re saying, this was just a rather illogical way to put it that doesn’t make sense to me.

^yes. Also, I’m pretty sure it’s a noun that people use as an adjective. Like that phrase “I’m not fat, I HAVE fat”
A lot of people seem to be getting lost on the logistics of this message, which is in part due to the vague way in which I presented it, but I like it that way.
So okay, let’s look at the definition of the word “adjective”:

To get to the quick, an adjective is a describing word.
An insult is not a describing word. 

An adjective, along with the right tone, can be spewed at someone as an insult - just as the word “fat” is most often used as an insult (ie. “stupid” “lazy” “unhealthy”) rather than a word to describe one’s body or presence.
Through this statement, I had hoped to propose that we focus on what “fat” DESCRIBES and focus less on what it may or may not IMPLY. Strip away all the negative implications of the word and what are you left with? A word that simply describes.
Yes, of course it is also a noun, bodies HAVE fat, but that’s not the point.
A person should feel free to DESCRIBE and DEFINE themselves as a FAT PERSON without inadvertently “putting themselves down”.

Two questions from a fitness student:
In college, we are constantly reminded not to use the word “fat” when conversing with clients for fear of insulting/offending them. For example, instead of saying “this will measure how much fat you have”, we’re taught to say “this will measure your body composition”. This doesn’t sit well with me, especially because some of my fellow classmates are fatter than the stereotypical personal trainer.
In a professional situation, how would you go about developing fat acceptance and the use of the word “fat” without offending clients?
What do you think is the best way to let my professors know, without getting myself on their bad side, that teaching us this way reinforces fat-shaming?

Hi! Wow, really interesting questions.
Yes, some people are not okay with identifying themselves or their bodies or any part of them as &#8220;fat&#8221; and that has to be respected, but that doesn&#8217;t mean we shouldn&#8217;t suggest that it isn&#8217;t a bad word and encourage its usage in a way that is inoffensive.
It&#8217;s hard to say what I would do in your situation as I am often very awkward in speaking with people and articulating my thoughts in person - most of the time I feel as though I&#8217;m just flying by the seat of my pants.
But the long and short of it is, whenever it&#8217;s appropriate - I would just open up a dialogue about it. Have some talking points ready about why you support the usage of the word &#8220;fat&#8221; within a positive context and take it from there.
How is &#8220;fat&#8221; used within a positive context? By incorporating honest words like &#8220;beautiful&#8221; and &#8220;lovely&#8221; and &#8220;resilient&#8221; when you&#8217;re talking about it, because it&#8217;s all true and needs to be said. Removing that tone of voice we all know exists when people spit it as an insult, with disgust or exasperation, is also important. Speak of it matter-of-factly, reinforce its delivery with love and a smile. I am still working on this myself, so I&#8217;m afraid I do not have all the answers.
Really just try to bring home the fact that &#8220;fat&#8221; exists on all healthy bodies. There is no reason to be frightened of using it. And through using it more often, in a positive and/or practical context, perhaps we can begin to relieve the word of its negative baggage.
Have some resources at the ready, facts and articles to back up your claims/arguments, as I&#8217;m sure you will experience some form of (hopefully respectful) push-back from your professors/peers. I have a small collection of resources on fat acceptance and fat health here, if you feel so inclined to peruse them.
Keep in mind that trying to get some people to listen to you on this subject can be extremely difficult. Just try to keep in mind that not all minds have the capacity to be swayed. If it&#8217;s not sinking in, shrug it off and move on - there are plenty of other people who are willing to learn and open their minds up to new perspectives who deserve your attention.
Good on you for making an effort in opening up the floor for this type of discussion. I hope I was able to help in some way, and best of luck. Keep me updated on what happens!
&lt;3 Haley

fitnessmisconceptions:

[Image text: “‘Fat’ is an adjective, not an insult”]

redefiningbodyimage:

morganchooses:

anatomyofaqueen:

redefiningbodyimage:

“Fat” is an adjective - not an insult.

Erm… Words used as insults generally ARE adjectives… and just about every other type of word. Like Nouns, etc o.O It’s all in how you USE the word that MAKES it an insult. I could make PUDDING an insult if  I wanted to. Or Plates, or Pants, or Cookies.

I get what you’re saying, this was just a rather illogical way to put it that doesn’t make sense to me.

^yes. Also, I’m pretty sure it’s a noun that people use as an adjective. Like that phrase “I’m not fat, I HAVE fat”

A lot of people seem to be getting lost on the logistics of this message, which is in part due to the vague way in which I presented it, but I like it that way.

So okay, let’s look at the definition of the word “adjective”:

To get to the quick, an adjective is a describing word.

An insult is not a describing word

An adjective, along with the right tone, can be spewed at someone as an insult - just as the word “fat” is most often used as an insult (ie. “stupid” “lazy” “unhealthy”) rather than a word to describe one’s body or presence.

Through this statement, I had hoped to propose that we focus on what “fat” DESCRIBES and focus less on what it may or may not IMPLY. Strip away all the negative implications of the word and what are you left with? A word that simply describes.

Yes, of course it is also a noun, bodies HAVE fat, but that’s not the point.

A person should feel free to DESCRIBE and DEFINE themselves as a FAT PERSON without inadvertently “putting themselves down”.

Two questions from a fitness student:

In college, we are constantly reminded not to use the word “fat” when conversing with clients for fear of insulting/offending them. For example, instead of saying “this will measure how much fat you have”, we’re taught to say “this will measure your body composition”. This doesn’t sit well with me, especially because some of my fellow classmates are fatter than the stereotypical personal trainer.

  1. In a professional situation, how would you go about developing fat acceptance and the use of the word “fat” without offending clients?
  2. What do you think is the best way to let my professors know, without getting myself on their bad side, that teaching us this way reinforces fat-shaming?

Hi! Wow, really interesting questions.

Yes, some people are not okay with identifying themselves or their bodies or any part of them as “fat” and that has to be respected, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t suggest that it isn’t a bad word and encourage its usage in a way that is inoffensive.

It’s hard to say what I would do in your situation as I am often very awkward in speaking with people and articulating my thoughts in person - most of the time I feel as though I’m just flying by the seat of my pants.

But the long and short of it is, whenever it’s appropriate - I would just open up a dialogue about it. Have some talking points ready about why you support the usage of the word “fat” within a positive context and take it from there.

How is “fat” used within a positive context? By incorporating honest words like “beautiful” and “lovely” and “resilient” when you’re talking about it, because it’s all true and needs to be said. Removing that tone of voice we all know exists when people spit it as an insult, with disgust or exasperation, is also important. Speak of it matter-of-factly, reinforce its delivery with love and a smile. I am still working on this myself, so I’m afraid I do not have all the answers.

Really just try to bring home the fact that “fat” exists on all healthy bodies. There is no reason to be frightened of using it. And through using it more often, in a positive and/or practical context, perhaps we can begin to relieve the word of its negative baggage.

Have some resources at the ready, facts and articles to back up your claims/arguments, as I’m sure you will experience some form of (hopefully respectful) push-back from your professors/peers. I have a small collection of resources on fat acceptance and fat health here, if you feel so inclined to peruse them.

Keep in mind that trying to get some people to listen to you on this subject can be extremely difficult. Just try to keep in mind that not all minds have the capacity to be swayed. If it’s not sinking in, shrug it off and move on - there are plenty of other people who are willing to learn and open their minds up to new perspectives who deserve your attention.

Good on you for making an effort in opening up the floor for this type of discussion. I hope I was able to help in some way, and best of luck. Keep me updated on what happens!

<3 Haley


Source: redefiningbodyimage
Tags: HAES body image fat fitness insults health


TEXT
7:52 pm
May 22, 2012
4 notes
Redefining Health

submission from maddylouboo:

Hello! I wrote this a few days ago, and wanted to submit it to your blog a) because I adore your blog, and b) because I think it’s really relevant to what you’re doing here. I’m sure there have been discussions about this topic before, but it’s super important to me, and we need to keep talking about it! It includes a lot of my personal journey, and I hope that it can inspire more people to share their journeys, even though I know they’re incredibly hard to talk about. I’m also planning on a picture or two of me soon being happy and curvy and crazy and stylish, because everything about this blog is rad. So, here you go:

Understanding how health is portrayed in the media and our everyday language as a means of objectification, control, and sizist reinforcement of patriarchy is a necessary step in understanding health on the individual level.  We’re trained constantly, whether we’re aware of it or not, to think there is one way to be healthy and that all of that health is dependent on our bodies. This automatically falsely places value in the physical, and since the expectations are far different and even more unattainable for women than men, talking about health perpetuates sexism, the harmful gender dichotomy, and the continued struggle for ridiculous, arbitrary goals rather than personalized success. I could write a lot about this, and I hope to later, but for now I want to share my own personal experience related to the topic of harmful health reinforcement.

In high school, I didn’t feel like I fit in. I believed in and liked different things than all of my peers. I behaved differently. Even though I wanted to support and represent individuality, it took a huge toll on my confidence. And not fitting in physically only heightened those differences. I hit puberty when I was around eleven, way earlier than the other girls; I was taller than literally every student and many teachers, men and women alike; and I was a larger size than most everyone as well. To me, not physically fitting in just gave everyone an easy way to see and judge that difference and every other difference. Needless to say, it was a horrifying struggle for me, and as I placed more and more importance on my body, my self-esteem got lower and lower.

Eventually, right before senior year, I ended up losing around ten pounds and it made me feel a lot better. I decided I wanted to lose a bit more, and be happy with my body. I tried to join a support club for plus-size women. Its focus was weight loss, rather than health, but at the time that’s what I thought I needed. I showed up to a meeting, and all of the women there were surprised to see me. Many of them were considered obese, and since I was much taller than everyone, the fact that we weighed the same amount made it so I didn’t hit the obesity mark—numbers defining weight and this notion of obesity are incredibly arbitrary and relative, by the way.

They ladies at the meeting abruptly told me I should leave because I didn’t have the same problem that they did. Perhaps I was physically ‘healthier,’ but I’m sure I was struggling in my head just the same. That’s the nature of distorted image. I was crushed, because I had finally stepped out of my comfort zone, attempted to get help, and was trying to connect with others who shared my struggle. And I was rejected, just like that. I didn’t feel like I had anywhere safe to go. In retrospect, I realize that the women at the meeting didn’t feel safe with me there because they perceived me as much smaller and capable of judging them. They deserve that safety, but I still wish the situation would have been handled more tactfully.

Next I turned to the online community and found out about fat admirers, or FAs. I was so excited to learn that there were men who weren’t repulsed by fatness, but actually sexually attracted to it! When I started getting involved, I soon realized that, yet again, I wasn’t fitting in. I don’t have a VBO (visible belly outline) which was a highly desire trait. Many of the men wanted me to gain, and I didn’t want to. I also realized that much of the admiration created activities that actually involved the size. There are fetishes that, while I respect them, simply aren’t what I’m into. I began to get really discouraged again, because now my size wasn’t negatively judged, it was only fetishized. I feel like my size doesn’t actually affect who I am or what they like, and I want to be treated as such.

It has been exceedingly difficult but also interesting to learn that the space we take up, and how we take up that space, can make it so we have no space to go; no space to feel safe and understood and not judged. However, the focus shouldn’t even be on space and size! We talk about being healthy, and seem to equate that with being thin and active; physically healthy. Now we talk about health at any size, and that’s awesome. But you know what’s more important to me than my physical health? My mental health! Trying to tackle my body image issues when I wasn’t mentally healthy was a huge mistake, one that is forced on way too many people.

Right now I stand 5’11”, weigh 223 pounds, wear a US size 16-18, and most days, I feel attractive. On some great days I feel beautiful and even sexy, and it feels amazing, even more so because I know feeling happy at my size is a huge rebellion against what the cruelty of society wants me to do. I’m still on a journey to discovering how to become healthy—healthy in terms of me, not anyone else. I need to consider the severe confidence issues I’ve dealt with, and how they lead to depression and suicide attempts. I need to consider that even though I certainly can be healthy at my size, I have things other than my weight, like bad asthma and knee issues, that affect my health and make physical activity difficult. I also need to remember that my opinion of myself is the only one that really matters, and not get discouraged if other people don’t like it.  Only I can define what health means for me and how important it is.

Only I know my experience, just as each of you only knows yours. Only we can best assess our needs. If we keep trying to reach one kind of health—even at any size—that’s giving in to a system that aims to control us and take away the essence of who we are. We all mean more than what our bodies look like, and we all deserve to have our unique experiences honored and validated. I realize it’s a tall order, especially since I’ve felt the absolute turmoil of being viewed as unhealthy, and can still clearly remember and feel it. But I’m confident that working hard to individually re-asses and culturally redefine our notion of health will ultimately be the most positive and liberating—in other words, healthy—step we can all take for ourselves and others.



Tags: submission story body image fat health


TEXT
11:37 pm
May 17, 2012
3 notes
I was SO naked

from veronikerr:

Hay girl hay.

I had no idea you had this blog. I love every inch of it, every word! I wanted to share a little something with you I did this year, that I’m proud of and I’ve never done before.

Every year we go to a “pirate party” of sorts and hang out with some of our closest friends. We always get two joined rooms, get drunk and have a good time. When it came to changing in front of each other though, I always used to go in the bathroom or whatever. But this time, I didn’t! And I didn’t care! I changed in front of my closest friends and I was never comfortable enough to do it until now.

If you didn’t know, I’m 23 years old, 240 lbs and a size 20. Always been big, parents say I came by it honestly, but that’s neither here nor there. But since I’ve always been this way, it felt really good to just be. And not give a crap what anyone thought. Because even though they’re my friends, I still worried. I didn’t want to disturb them with my body - but they have flaws, I see them and I don’t care because they’re awesome people.

I finally understand that if they’re really my friends, they don’t care about those flaws and can laugh with me when I smack my fiance with my boob because it’s just funny! AWESOME. Really. You have no idea. Or maybe you do, whatever.

Honestly though I’d love to contribute to one of your projects sometime. Not in a designery way because we know I suck at that. LOL. But a picture, a few words, whatever. This is a great blog and I want you to know it!

——

BABE hello!!!! Thank you for all your nice words! I miss you and I’m so glad you submitted this. Experiences like that are so liberating, I know exactly how you feel and I love that you smack your fiance with your boob because, as my significant other can attest to, I too enjoy using my breasts as weapons. :3

And for the record, I fucking love your work and I think you’re a lovely designer. If I ever get this goddamn zine idea off the ground, I’d love your help and/or bodacious bod to take photos of.

<3 Haley



Tags: submission body image body acceptance naked nudity