TW: Fat shaming
submitted by agoodnewbeginning:
I am a swim instructor for Milwaukee Recreation Aquatics and I was asked the question above by the mother of a student in one of my swim classes this week. She was referring to myself and the instructor who was working on the other side of the pool. As soon as my brain was able to process her question, I was momentarily speechless before I almost began to bitch her out about how we can be fat swimmers. But I didn’t. Instead, I gave her my cookie cutter answer about how I have always been big and it never affected how I swam. I kept my anger to myself and instead let it stew inside me for the rest of the night.
By the time I woke up this morning, I was in a bad place. The thought of putting on my swimsuit and going to work made me nauseous. Who else was thinking these same things but didn’t say it out loud, or worse, just didn’t say it to my face? I laid in bed, contemplating calling in sick before remembering that this woman and her words have no influence over my life. I was a competitive swimmer for seven years and at no point was I less than 150 pounds. I haven’t been self conscious walking around in a swimsuit in forever and I wasn’t going to let some woman who thinks she has the right to question my body make me feel bad about myself.
This is what I was wearing when she made her comment:
So, the answer to her question? I don’t know. What I do know is that I’m Mona. I am a 20 year old, 5 feet 9 inch, 236 pound swim teacher and I haven’t ever loved myself as much as I do right now. I’m not uncomfortable with my belly…are you?
Girl, as a former competitive swimmer of ten years who now can’t even think about stepping foot in a public pool without feeling ill in so many ways and for so many reasons…this touched me on such a personal level you got me in tears.
I can’t even formulate a thought past this point. Thank you so much for sharing this. Hahaha I’m feeling so many things and laughing and crying all at once, I don’t even know what to do! Just thank you, and I really love and appreciate your belly and your everything, your words are so healing to me.
- Haley Cue